Monday, 1 April 2013


Tomorrow begins a new chapter in our lives.  I am taking Nate to "daycare" tomorrow.  And I am a bit of a mess at the moment. 

I know it's the best thing to do for him- to have him in an environment where the people are trained to help him.  But this mama can't stand the thought that he will be confused and scared initially.  And he won't have any way to communicate that.  Other than screaming of course. 

Eventually, I will likely begin to enjoy having a little bit more freedom.  Working full time from home and having the kids in the house is definitely advantageous in many ways, but it also takes away many of the positive aspects of working as well.  Such as the time for one's self, the ability to run errands, the privelege of being able to focus on work.  I am very proud of myself for handling this particular juggling act for so many years, but the truth is, it has made me a little bit crazy.  My husband just doesn't understand how I am constantly planning my next 15 moves- everything is mapped out, continously reassessed, and mommy is, well, she's tense, all the time.  There is no other way to accomplish what I have been doing.  Or at least I haven't found one.

I will be driving Nate to daycare after the bus drops him off tomorrow, mainly because the new bus stop is not yet "official" for him, that can take awhile.  I am dreading leaving him.  I have really loved our lunches and I will miss him so much.  I just never thought I would be packing my three year old a lunch, or putting him on a bus for that matter.

On a positive note, we have been working with Nate on the 3D shape sorter ipad app for about a month.

Tonight it was like a little light went on in my boy's head.  He has been moving the shapes over, but I have been having to very actively direct him on which shape to try, when to turn the cube, etc.  Tonight he was suddenly figuring it out on his own, and attempting new shapes when I would just say "uhoh no go".  He was definitely basing it on matching the outline colors as well.  He kept restarting the app when he was done, he was having fun.  And eventually he started saying "uh oh no" with me, or something close to it.  All of this for a little bit of confetti when he finishes.  Really really cool to watch the wheels in his head turning.

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